Worry Less, Do More: 6 Ways to Regain Control Today

family mindset self discipline self improvement worry Aug 12, 2025
young woman with hands on either side of her face, worried

Today, we’re diving into a topic that lives rent-free in all our heads: worry. That low-grade mental noise, that spiral of "what-ifs" and "should-haves" that drains our energy and clutters our minds. But what if we could shift that energy into something better? Something productive. Something empowering. That’s what today is all about.

The Problem with Worrying

Let’s be brutally honest: we waste a lot of emotional energy worrying about things we can’t change. The weather. Our genetics. Someone else’s opinion of us. And when you’re a high-performing mom trying to juggle work, parenting, and personal growth, that worry can creep in and take root in your day before you even realize it.

 

At the hospital, I’ve caught myself worrying about everything from whether my colleagues spend as much time in the hospital as I do to why I always get the toughest patient cases. It used to gnaw at me—why did I have to be the one carrying the heaviest patient load? Why was I held to a different standard than too many of my male counterparts who were allowed to come and go without question?

 

But you know what? None of that worrying made me better. It just made me tired.

It didn’t help my patients, it didn’t improve my working conditions, and it certainly didn’t help me feel at peace. So I had to learn to stop giving away my energy to things I couldn’t control. And that started by getting clear about what I could control.

The Only Two Things You Can Control

Here’s the core truth I want you to hold onto: you can only control two things—your actions and your thoughts.

 

Everything else? Background noise.

 

You choose what you eat. Whether you move your body. Whether you reply with grace or sarcasm. Whether you spiral into resentment or choose gratitude. Your thoughts shape your words. Your words shape your actions. And your actions shape your outcomes.

I learned this lesson early in my career. I was tired of feeling defeated after every shift. But it wasn’t until I started changing my internal monologue—even just 10 degrees—that everything else began to shift. A minor mindset course correction can completely change your day.

How to Refocus Your Attention: 6 Strategies That Actually Work

  1. Start each hour with intention.

Instead of letting the day run you, check in and ask, "What can I do with the next 60 minutes that will matter?" Not tomorrow. Not next week. Now.

 

When I walk into the hospital, I pray there's not already a code blue or a new admission waiting. If it’s calm, I start with a chart review—it’s the most productive first hour. That hour sets the tone for the rest of the shift. And when I'm home, especially when my daughter was little, I had our lives mapped down to the hour. From daycare drop-offs to dance parties before bedtime, our schedule gave us both peace and predictability.

 

Efficiency doesn't mean you're heartless. It means you're present.

 

  1. Interrupt the spiral.

When worry shows up (and it will), ask yourself, "Can I control this?" If not, bless it and release it.

 

Swimming used to be my escape, but even there, I found myself stewing over a toxic coworker. My solution? A waterproof headset and an audiobook. That one change turned my rumination time into recovery time. Check out the Shownotes if you want to know more about my waterproof headset.

 

  1. Reconnect with your goals.

When I lost my husband, my priorities changed. I’d had two main goals: protect our daughter and pay off my med school debt. Protecting my daughter’s future financially took immediate precedence over the education debt. Even at 22% interest. Grief has a way of stripping things down to essentials. And when I got sick, the focus shifted again. I had to make peace with not even trying to do everything and zero in on what mattered most.

 

Let your goals anchor you.

 

  1. Know the difference between influence and control.

We all want what’s best for our children. But as they grow, we shift from controlling to influencing. My daughter now makes decisions that may make me internally cringe. But that’s part of her growth. I’ve taught what I can. The rest? I have to trust.

 

And that trust is a gift you give yourself.

 

  1. Be solution-oriented.

You don’t have to solve everything alone, but you do need to know when it’s time to stop analyzing and start acting. I once stayed in a toxic work environment too long. I thought I could fix it. I couldn’t. So, I found a better job. And you can too.

 

If you feel like you’re stuck, maybe it’s time to change the room you’re in.

 

  1. Reflect daily.

Before bed, take five minutes. Ask: What did I do today that mattered? What drained me? What gave me energy?

 

No judgment. Just observation.

 

Dr. Elaine Stageberg, who joined us on Episode 129, inspired me with her approach to time management and goals. She plans her life in quarters, not years. It helps her adjust faster and finish more. Inspired by her, I now look at my calendar monthly and weekly. It’s made me more aware of how I use my time.

Conclusion

Life is complex. Your responsibilities are vast. But your mindset? That can be refreshingly simple.

 

You are not too late. Not too tired. Not too stuck. You are just getting started.

 

Focus on your actions. Focus on your thoughts. Ask yourself, every single day: What can I accomplish today?

 

Then go do it.

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