Cherish the Moments: A Christmas Reflection for Physician and Executive Moms
Dec 23, 2025
Christmas has a way of magnifying everything—our joy, our exhaustion, our desire to make moments meaningful, and sometimes, the ache of what (or who) is missing. For so many physician and executive moms, the season arrives with a blend of wonder and pressure: school events to attend, shifts to cover, end-of-year deadlines, and an endless list of things we hope we’ll get to in time.
But this year, Christmas has taken on a different texture for me.
Last month, my stepdaughter died suddenly at just 38.
We hadn’t been allowed to be part of her life for years after losing her father. The chance to reconnect—something I always believed would happen “someday”—quietly disappeared. The grief has been complicated, layered with love, loss, and the harsh reminder that someday isn’t guaranteed.
And yet, strangely, what keeps rising to the surface is gratitude.
Not because loss is beautiful or because everything happens for a reason. But because the experience sharpened something in me—something I think all of us need as mothers, as professionals, and as women trying to live fully in our limited time on this earth.
Christmas is not actually about perfection. It’s about presence.
And presence becomes priceless when you’ve been reminded that time is not promised.
The Gift We Forget We’re Already Holding
As physicians and executives, we are trained to plan, predict, prevent, and prepare. We live years in the future—charting long-term goals, anticipating outcomes, trying to build a life that’s stable and secure for the people we love.
But losing my stepdaughter reminded me of something painfully simple:
the only time we can actually touch is now.
Not the childhood you wish you had time to create.
Not the dream vacation you’ll take “after things slow down.”
Not the conversation you’ll have “when the chaos ends.”
Not the reconnection you think you’ll make “one day.”
Now.
This breath.
This meal around your table.
This child in front of you, growing faster than you realize.
This holiday season—imperfect, loud, messy, beautiful.
The moments we worry we’re not doing well enough are, in fact, the moments we will someday miss.
Gratitude Isn’t a Feeling—It’s a Practice
When I talk to single mom physicians or women leading intense careers, I hear the same fear again and again:
“I’m stretched so thin. What if I’m missing their childhood?”
Here’s the truth I’m learning to live by:
You don’t need more time. You need more presence inside the time you already have.
Gratitude isn’t about ignoring grief or pretending everything is fine.
It’s about choosing—on purpose—to notice what is good even while you carry what is hard.
This Christmas, your gratitude practice might sound like:
• “I’m grateful for this messy kitchen because it means my kids are here.”
• “I’m grateful for this work because it allows me to provide stability.”
• “I’m grateful for five minutes of quiet because today was a lot.”
• “I’m grateful for the people I love because time is a gift, not a guarantee.”
Gratitude doesn’t erase loss. It illuminates what still remains.
A Christmas Invitation for You
As you move through this season—between shifts, concerts, gift-wrapping, and grocery store lines—I want you to give yourself permission to slow down enough to truly see your life.
Not the life you wish you had.
Not the one you’re still building.
Not the one you’re worried isn’t good enough.
The one right in front of you.
Hold your kids a little tighter.
Let the dishes wait one more hour.
Say the thing you’ve been meaning to say.
Take the picture, even if no one looks ready.
Laugh at something you would normally rush past.
Let gratitude be your anchor—not out of obligation, but out of choice.
Because you never know how long you get to hold the people you love.
And because the miracle of Christmas was never about what we achieve—it’s about what we receive.
Presence.
Grace.
Love.
Time.
This year, that’s the gift I hope you give yourself.
Reflection Questions
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What is one small moment today you’re grateful you didn’t rush past?
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Where in your life do you feel the pressure to be perfect, and how could you replace that with presence?
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Who in your life have you been meaning to reconnect with, and what is one small step you can take this week?
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What holiday moment do you want your children to remember years from now?
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How does acknowledging the fragility of time shift the way you approach this season?
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